Like my little boy band title line do ya? No?

Well, everyone, I’m actually on a plane right about now heading for Disneyland!!! Sadly, no more seeing Karen cause of a strep throat incident. But better safe than sorry, and I’ll see her next month in San Fran!

So since I’m not ‘really’ here, I didn’t want to do some big deep post that I can’t return to chat with you about. So instead, how about some gas humor? No, not that kind of gas, gas for your car!! Or maybe you’d already guessed.

See you all next week!

Since Amie is taking the summer off from blogging, we’ll fill in Tuesday’s with some kind of news story that you may or may not give shit about

And speaking of shit….

Tuesday News:

Naked Man Rescued from Porta-Potty

Rescue crews in Pennsylvania had to cut apart a portable potty to save a naked, drunk man who had somehow lodged himself inside the “holding tank.”

According to authorities, the 31-year-old man got drunk, removed his clothes, got stuck inside the “potty,” then called 911 on his cell phone. He was charged with public drunkenness and violating the health code.

The full report can be found here.

Feisty and Karen have abandoned us sauntered off to RT (for those who don’t know, the Romantic Times Convention). So sadly they will likely not be blogging this week.

They’ll be enjoying things like….

And….

And of course…

So you ladies have fun! We’re so f*cking jealous excited for you! Take lots of pictures!

It’s Tuesday. I’m bloggin’.  What am I gonna blog about?  Characterization.  And in the process I’m going to tell you WAY more about this writer’s brain than you EVER wanted to know.

I blogged over at Southern Fried Chicas yesterday on why I watch so much TV.   I’ll save you the trouble of popping over there (but feel free if you want)…I watch TV because of characterization and good writing.  Ring any bells with anyone?

Yeah, pretty much the same reason we read books.

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again.  Characterization is KING (and queen and everything else).  If you don’t write characters I care about, I could care less what your book is about. I won’t read it. I won’t finish it (admittedly most books I don’t finish aren’t wall-bangers, they’re MEH which IMO is the kiss of death.  FWIW Voice ranks right up there with characterization in equal amounts).

So what does this have to do with the crazy workings of my brain?

(more…)

You know what sounds nice?

A trip to Hawaii…

A beach front getaway to Mexico…

One week stay at a Ranch in Wyoming…

A night at Nora Roberts Inn…

Or maybe you don’t want to get away, maybe you’d just love a chance to rub elbows or get a read from an editor/agent?

The Read of a Proposal from Roberta Brown at The Brown Agency…

Evaluation of a Proposal and Drinks at RWA National with Jennifer Jackson at the Donald Maass Agency…

Lunch with Kensington Books Editor Kate Duffy in San Francisco…

The Read of A Book Proposal W/Telephone Conference WITHIN 1 WEEK by Harlequin Editor Brenda Chin …

So where am I going with all this? Is it all just fantasy talk? Not at all! These are just a few of the fabulous items up for bid at the 4th annual Brenda Novak auction to raise money for Diabetes research! The first year raised $34,982, which went directly to research. Year 2 did even better raising $62,705. In year three, they more than doubled at $141,700. This years goal is 150k!

Well, we ladies at Naughty and Spice are getting involved too! We’ve donated a ‘basket’ with lots of fun things to be bid on. Check it out here.

The auction runs from May 1-May 31st (with some one day auctions!) But the items are already up for you to peruse. So really, go check out all the great stuff. It’s all for a good cause, and some of the items truly are once in a life time opportunity!

Okay I am without a doubt totally cheating here today. What do you think? And if you click on the cover, you can read an excerpt on my website :)

Here’s the blurb from the back:

When the Cavanaugh sisters* inherit the family moving company, they figure they’re “man” enough for the job. They’ll show those bad boys of Texas just how good these three gals are at getting exactly what they want….

Reecie is a caretaker from teh word go–she’s all business,w ehther it’s family or work. So she is more htan ready to let easygoing Jack Sunders step in and take care of her in the most intimate way possible…

Robbie Jo loves a good time at work and in bed–until she meets rodeo rider Cash McBride and realizes she’s ready to settle down and ride one man long and hard…

Carla is tired of sweating for a living. But getting hot and bothered around real estate attorney Josh Winters puts her in the mood for some seriously steamy sex…

Now…here’s where the NOT cheating comes in. Here’s where knowing how to write a killer query letter pays off.

1. Killer queries get you noticed (requests)

2. The most important part of your query is, without a doubt, the part where you tell your agent or editor about your book–We’ll call it the blurb.

3. Killer queries means writing a killer blurb.

4. I write killer blurbs. Matter of fact, my editor said I made her job easy. Why you ask? I’ll show you.

(more…)

Today we have author Jenna Bayley-Burke visiting Naughty and Spice. She’s writes for multiple publishers and today is asking everyone quite a fun question! Should love scenes be tested? Or stay a fantasy…

* * *

Would you could you in a tree?

Could you would on your knees?

Would you could you in a box?

Could you would you with a Fox?

Would you could you on a boat?

Could you would you do what you wrote?

Maybe?

Thanks for having me at Naughty & Spice y’all. When I started to write this post I knew I wanted to talk about where our characters make love because it plays a part in my last two releases…but Feisty’s post yesterday got me thinking…if there is such a thing as TMI from authors about their personal lives, isn’t it sometimes because people ask?

I know I had to be careful in both For Kicks and Her Cinderella Complex when they had water scenes. When I read a sex in water scene written as a slip and slide I roll my eyes. It’s not that easy. It works, yes, but it’s all in how you do it.

In For Kicks the heroine is a virgin. Kinda. It’s complicated. But anyway, sex in the tub that first time? Not so much. Fun in the tub? Great prelude to coming attractions. Things progressed. Phone sex. Hotel room sex. And THEN pool sex. But that is the cherry on top. Hmmm…pun intended?

Locations for lovin’ become part of the dirty talk for the couple in Her Cinderella Complex. When Heather realizes she’s just lived out two of her fantasies (skinny dipping, kissing under water) she decides to list them all…and then improvise a few more as things go really, really well. The pool, under a waterfall, on a trampoline…

I love reading about different locations as much as I love writing about them. But do I want to know the reality behind it? Do I want to know if an author made sure you really can have sex on a cruise ship balcony or in a treehouse?

Nope. I like my fantasies much better J No worries about pictures surfacing on the internet or having to call your best friend and explain why you need bail money. But then, I am a total chicken.

What do you think? Do you like thinking the love scenes in books come with an ‘reliably tested, completely approved’ stamp, or should they just stay part of the fantasy? And if you ‘don’t wanna know’…then next time you hear someone make a snide comment about how acrobatic an author must be to keep up with all the research for her writing be sure to chime in that Stephen King never killed anyone to research his books. That we know of at least…

Thanks for having me, y’all!

Jenna Bayley-Burke

http://www.jennabayleyburke.com/;

HER CINDERELLA COMPLEX

FOR KICKS