Dirty talk.

So, do you talk dirty in bed? I don’t. In fact, it totally turns me off. However, I have found that many of my um, characters like to whisper sweet nothings into their partner’s ear. Well, my characters are dirty little things and they have minds of their own. Plus, I think dirty talk is pretty common amongst even vanilla some folk.

Do you watch Rock of Love? That episode where Brett Michaels had all the contestants talk dirty over the phone to him was pretty hot. And hey! Didn’t Poison sing that song, Talk Dirty to Me? That song was a total hit. I mean, if a song goes crazy on the charts there must be something to it, right?

Anyhow, if you want to get started on the verbal nastiness, here is a tip. Just talk about what you’re doing, or what you want him to do to you. For example:

“Oh, you rock of love! I just love it so very much when you plummet your man member into my vagina!”

Or:

“Oh, I just love to take your man member into my mouth and suck, suck suck your man juice down my throat!”

See? Instant hotness. Am I right?

So I bought this book…

…and you can find out more about it here.

I chose it for research purposes, ahem. I liked that fact that it pointed out how America in general has the appearance of being a prudish, uptight society. But if you go deep into the heart of the midwest, for example, you’ll find couples signing up for exotic vacations where they can swap partners, etc.

I’ve only read a little bit of it (just got it, and haven’t had much reading time lately - hub is still out of town!) but it’s interesting. And very true. The society we present as a public image is rather prudish and uptight. Yet it seems to be a growing phenomenon that behind closed doors (or in exotic locales, fetish clubs, etc.) we’re doing the wild thing in an extra wild way.

Which is great for us as erotic romance/erotica writers (more interest/sales - yay!). There’s nothing wrong with a positive view on sexuality. All of that negativity and prudishness drives me batty to be honest.

Though I have to say I was totally shocked when I walked through my local B&N this morning and saw this book face out on the shelf. It was the sexuality area but still! Naughty.

So has anyone read this book (the first book not the naughty book, LOL)? Heard any buzz on this book? Think that we as a society are a bunch of prudes and we should embrace our inner sexpots and let it all hang out? Discuss.

How stupid am I?

I ran out of gas this morning…in my garage.  Yes, IN the garage.  As in, I apparently BARELY made it home from work yesterday.   *sigh*

I haven’t run out of gas in, well, since I had kids so at least fourteen years.  That’s just NOT something you want to do with kids, ya know?  They NEVER let you live it down–trust me I’m still hearing about locking my keys in the car at Christmas.

So come on, cough it up. What’s the dumbest thing you’ve done in the last 30 days. Make me feel better (and not so alone).

Well, since I’m a dork and forgot to blog last night (I was in a 2k writing groove!). I’m going to cop out and put up a video. But really? I’m SO glad it gives me a reason NOT to wait until Video Saturday!

Jimmy Kimmel’s official response to his girlfriend Sarah Silverman’s video about f*cking Matt Damon. You don’t want to miss this.

Well now, there’s a visual I didn’t need.

Thanks to Amie for inviting me to guest blog! It’s my normal day to blog on my critique group blog - www.butterscotchmartinigirls.com, but I’ll be funneling everyone here today!

Anyway, let’s start this off right. My name is Cassie Ryan and I write hot books.

Yup, that’s me. Call it what you will–sex with a plot, panty-igniting, snarky and seditious, soft porn, or any of a hundred other labels, and uh huh–you’re on the right track. Hell, my books even have a warning label!
(And damn, if I don’t sell more books because of that cute little label “Warning! This is a Really hot book. Sexually Explicit.”

So what does this have to do with every day life and why do you care?

Well, the above (or reading my books) will let you know that clearly, I’m not a prude by anyone’s stretch of the imagination. I love sex, love doing it (sorry for the TMI moment!), love reading about it, and love dreaming up some fun scenarios so my characters can have it–usually LOTS of it. But call me picky–I do have to have some plot with my sex.

The erotic and erotic romance markets are still booming, although I think they will start to slow a bit pretty soon and the ranks of books will thin and the quality will skyrocket. It’s inevitable in any market or genre that has had the huge surge in popularity and sales that this one has. But I digress…

I try to read broadly, not only in this genre, but in many others. (I was and still am a very avid and eclectic reader before I started writing for publication.) Anyway, that means I’ve read tons of erotic books and erotic romances. The first one I ever read was one of Cheyenne McCray’s earlier works–and especially since she’s a great lady and a good friend and not to mention a phenomenal writer–I will always hold her as one of my favorites.

When I discovered her books, I was in heaven. They had a great story with lots of plot twists, real emotions and yes, some steamy, melt the clasp on your bra sex scenes! So when I dipped my toe into writing within that genre, I wanted those same things in my books.
However, I also tend to have a much more sarcastic and scathing sense of humor that Chey, so my books definitely reflect that. For example, the Cunts.

Yup, you read that right. The Cunts.

They betrayed the crown on their homeworld and were banished to Earth, where the name of their race became synonymous with traitor and betrayer.

Now, let me say for the record that when I queried, pitched and even got edits, I fully expected someone–my agent, my editor, anyone, to say, NO WAY! You can’t do that! But other than a few bloggers who were cracking up throughout the book (and no, I wasn’t offended, it was written to be sarcastic, after all…lol) no one has even questioned my use of the dreaded “C” word. But, and here’s a big but–there is a ton of plot along with my sex!

So now that you think I’m on something and have jumped around to several subjects, I’ll try to pull it all together for you. As I said, I’ve read tons of erotic and erotic romance books, judged contests in those categories and even read online fan fiction in those genres, and the number one thing, even behind passive writing and backstory dumps that will make me put down a book is the total and complete absence of plot. If it resembles a loose plot like you see on a porno with a string of sex scenes in the middle–bingo! I’m not going to spend my precious and carefully guarded reading time on a story that doesn’t fully engage me. Because to me, sex (even with pretzel-type positions and twenty hot men in a room) isn’t worth reading about without the plot and the emotions behind it to tie it all together.

Does that mean I’m telling you that you have absolutely no taste if you don’t feel the same way. Nope. Obviously there are books like that on the market and they are selling well. It just means they don’t keep me engaged long enough to get to the group orgy on page three.

So, which do you prefer? Do you like your sex with some plot? Or do you like your sex with a side of sex and a sex chaser? Leave a comment and I’ll draw one of the commenters to win a free copy of Ceremony of Seduction–yup, the one with the Cunts!! :) If you’re not sure if you’re brave enough for it, there is an excerpt up on my MySpace page -

Tee Hee!

Cassie Ryan
Www.cassieryan.com
(aka, writer of lascivious porn with a plot)

In the proposal for my current project for Grand Central Publishing I have a scene planned in which the hero calls the heroine and instructs her to go into the nearest public restroom and masturbate while on the phone with him. The book takes place in San Francisco and when her phone rings she’s walking home from the post office. The nearest restaurant is a Chinese place. Good food, but a bit of a dive, as many of the best places in the City are known to be.

However, she goes inside and does it because she has to. It doesn’t matter the place smells like old fish and the restroom is also the storage room for the cleaning supplies. She walks right down the carpeted hallway, goes into the restroom, closes the door, leans back up against it, lifts her skirt and does her thing.

When I spoke with my editor about my proposal, I don’t think she was too hot on this scene. I think she wanted me to make it a lot less dirty. I can understand why. Dirty bathroom sex may not be sexy to a lot of people. But it is to me.

You see, I love the crude part of sex. Not all the time, but sometimes. Showing the less clean part of sex is what makes it real to me. I’ve had sex in a public bathroom. No, it wasn’t a gross place, but it wasn’t the Ritz, either. There were paper towels in the trash bin. There was a wilted plant. The sink had water in it from someone else washing her hands. I don’t know why, but those are the details I like to write about.

What about you? Do you like it dirty?