Tits & Ass = Erotic Romance? Um, no
So yeah we all write erotic romance on this blog. And it’s pretty hot, what we write, if I do say so myself. I’ve always leaned towards the hotter, more explicit stuff when I write, even before I discovered there was an actual subgenre called erotic romance. So when I happened upon it, I was thrilled. When I started reading it, I loved it. I even thought, “Hey, I could write this…”
Here I am a couple of years later writing it and actually getting it published. Not with the big dogs but that’s okay. Hopefully that will come with time. I enjoy writing erotic romance - I like writing about sex, relationships, tortured characters, funny characters. There’s the initial meeting, the build up, all of that sexual tension that makes you crazy, finally culminating into a passionate love scene (or two, or three - you get the idea). Aw, yeah baby! Gotta love it.
I have a gripe, though. A problem with romance writers who think they want to jump on the erotic romance bandwagon (though with the topics of late flying around forums and loops about RWA/PAN changes, I think less people wanna jump on that bandwagon. I’m not going there though). That all it takes is a bunch of tits and ass references and the hero/heroine thinking, “I wanna fuck do him/her NOW!” and presto! You have an erotic romance.
Sorry but that’s not true.
Okay, yeah, erotic romance is sexy and hot. Stimulating and mind blowing. Sometimes it’s just downright dirty and naughty and makes you wonder if that position is even possible. But it’s not bare bones writing with a few bad words thrown in for good measure. It’s not poorly written, emotionless sex for a few pages where the readers feel no connection.
As a reader I want to connect. I want to feel what the heroine is feeling, I want to know what the hero is thinking. As a writer, I try to portray that as much as possible. Hopefully I’m hitting the mark.
My friend and fellow erotic romance writer Emma Petersen described it best - it’s a feeling. A well crafted erotic romance book is a mood, it takes you someplace. It makes you feel good, it turns you on, whatever. It’s not bad porn.
When I see these attempts at erotic romance by those who most likely aren’t comfortable writing it, it looks like an attempt at bad porn. And I’m not bagging on those who try to write it and really want to. As with anything, it takes time to learn how to write something and write it well - but why force yourself to write something you’re clearly not comfortable doing? For instance, I could never write a romantic suspense. I would be so uncomfortable and I would make a complete mess of it. Trust me.
So as a reader, what are you looking for from an erotic romance novel? When you read a lot of it (and I do), you realize just how varied the genre is. Do you like it raunchy and dirty? Do you like it more flowery and descriptive? Sassy and funny? I’d love to hear your opinions.
May 30th, 2007 at 11:00 am
I’ve seen those kind of erotic romances books, where the author thinks it’s all just a couple choice words. Or it’s like 75% sex, and one scene where they meet at McDonalds or some sh*t. Those books make me a gag a little. Or a lot.
What I like to read? A book chalk full of plot. I don’t really like ’sex’ to be the plot. We must have sex to save the world. No. Give me plot with freaking fabulous sex. We must save the world together, and fuck while doing it.
May 30th, 2007 at 11:05 am
I love rwriting about sex because I love the background of the character regarding sex. Why does her ass give him a hard-on? Has he always loved asses? Did his mother spank him as a child? With what type of implement?
You get the picture.
Badly written sex is painful to read.
May 30th, 2007 at 11:11 am
I say all of the above-give me the plot-give me the raunch-give me the sassy funny. But yes I am a definite plot person-I love subplots too-side characters-series. I think I’m just nosy and want to know everything about everybody. And then yes-see them have sex. lol.
May 30th, 2007 at 11:13 am
Karen
What a great commentary! You are so right about the difference between erotic and porn. The plot, the characters, the setting and the story are all enhanced when the sex is sizzling. But without those key elements, it might as well be “I buy it for the articles!”
May 30th, 2007 at 11:18 am
I read romance and erotica long before I ever knew what it was. I didn’t read it to get off, I read it because the way Anias wrote spoke to me. She took the same words I use in everyday language and created beautiful symphonies that transport the readers to places they’ve never been in “real” life and sadly some will never be able to go.
When people read my work I want them to experience everything my characters experience. The breathlessness, the salty tang of sweat on skin, that tight feeling one can get in their pit of their stomach right before…
That is why I write erotic romance. Sadly, I forgot that. Thanks K for reminding me. As usual you rock my socks.
Emma
May 30th, 2007 at 12:29 pm
Wooooooooord!!!
I started writing erotica for a couple reasons. For one, it gave me an outlet for my sexual frustration, as my then-fiancé lived in another state. Also, I liked the challenge of writing a story where the sexual focus was essential to the plot.
O’course, then I realised later that what I wrote really counted as romance. I’m a softie at heart. ;)
It annoys me too how many people jump on the bandwagon because they want to make Big Bucks. Yes, erotic romance sells well, but if it’s not what you love doing… why do it?
May 30th, 2007 at 12:30 pm
I don’t care what it is as long as you can sell me on it, and to do that, you’ve got to have great characters and a great story. I want a great story that just happens to have hot sex. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a part of the plot–an extension of it is just fine.
May 30th, 2007 at 2:04 pm
I love writing erotic romance because of the huge opportunity it gives to get inside the characters’ heads. They’re at their most vulnerable, I love it!
May 30th, 2007 at 3:39 pm
I want to believe it, every word. I want to believe they’re hot for each other, and they love each other.
May 30th, 2007 at 5:31 pm
Nice to know, thanks Karen!
May 30th, 2007 at 5:35 pm
Great post, Karen
I love the traditional sappy romances, but the flowery wording is ridiculous and makes me giggle, losing the magic of the story. That’s why I love erotic romances. I want to read real language, but I don’t want to lose that passionate overpowering emotion called love along the way.
When erotic romances are done well, I think they’re the best thing going.
May 30th, 2007 at 7:27 pm
I love romance novels. . . especially romantic suspense (which amazingly is what I write. Teehee). And the hotter, the better. Sometimes I get a bit annoyed at the purple prose that litters some of the mainstream romances. I know, I know. . . but, do you really think people don’t know that “his turgid staff of passion” is really his penis???
That being said, I want to feel connected when I read a romance. I want to feel the passion, the angst, the torment, and the pleasure. . . a few sex scenes and no plot don’t do a thing for me. . .
May 30th, 2007 at 9:05 pm
It depends on my mood. It’s like having sex… sometimes I just want to get pounded … (Oh was that TMI?) ;)
May 30th, 2007 at 9:17 pm
LMFAO MICHELLE!!!!!!!!
May 30th, 2007 at 9:22 pm
Ok yes I must respond to Michelle - hell yes sometimes I just wanna get pounded!!!
May 30th, 2007 at 11:23 pm
Karen - love the comments. I don’t write erotica, but sure do enjoy a good read!
Michelle - You go, girl!! :D I’m with Amie - ROFL.
May 31st, 2007 at 10:15 am
Me likey the sex.
But if there’s no plot, no tension, no conflict or obstacles to overcome, then what’s left? Yep. Bad Porn.
I also enjoy humor in erotic romance. Who said that sex should always be serious? I think funny, quirky, laugh-out-loud naughty sex is great.
Hell, throw your heroes and heroines into a giant bowl of whipped cream once and a while, and let them roll around in that! ROFL.
May 31st, 2007 at 1:34 pm
Cassandra! I love that you love humor in erotic romance. I write a lot of that and wonder how many people actually like it. A lot of people say they don’t want to laugh when they’re supposed to be getting turned on. But then I say to them, go read porn if you’re only wanting to be turned on.
June 4th, 2007 at 11:56 am
What I look for is the story. I like erotic romance AND mainstream romance for the same reasons. I look for believable characters who don’t speak like they are in junior high and story that doesn’t sound like my niece made it up. I’m easy to please and ticked off when I’m disappointed.
June 5th, 2007 at 5:23 pm
I love the emotion. I love the tone and feel and overall htoness of an erotic story. As a reader I tend to liek plot with strong characterization. As a writert I tend to start with characters and the plot/conflict just comes from them naturally.