I was recently at a suburbia-hell barbeque when I drunkenly admitted I was getting a new tattoo. The woman I was talking to appeared slightly shocked and asked me if I was having a midlife crisis. I smiled, bitch-slapped her and said no. Then I ate another shrimp skewer.

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So yeah we all write erotic romance on this blog. And it’s pretty hot, what we write, if I do say so myself. I’ve always leaned towards the hotter, more explicit stuff when I write, even before I discovered there was an actual subgenre called erotic romance. So when I happened upon it, I was thrilled. When I started reading it, I loved it. I even thought, “Hey, I could write this…”

Here I am a couple of years later writing it and actually getting it published. Not with the big dogs but that’s okay. Hopefully that will come with time. I enjoy writing erotic romance - I like writing about sex, relationships, tortured characters, funny characters. There’s the initial meeting, the build up, all of that sexual tension that makes you crazy, finally culminating into a passionate love scene (or two, or three - you get the idea). Aw, yeah baby! Gotta love it.

I have a gripe, though. A problem with romance writers who think they want to jump on the erotic romance bandwagon (though with the topics of late flying around forums and loops about RWA/PAN changes, I think less people wanna jump on that bandwagon. I’m not going there though). That all it takes is a bunch of tits and ass references and the hero/heroine thinking, “I wanna fuck do him/her NOW!” and presto! You have an erotic romance.

Sorry but that’s not true.

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Let’s just be honest. We all have fantasies. And by fantasies, I’m referring to the hot and sexy kind. Sometimes fantasies are the spark that keeps our sex life going, and sometimes…they’re the spark that keeps our writing going.

I think, as erotica/erotic romance writers, we’ve got to be comfortable with our sexuality whether we’re writing graphic vanilla sex or….a little bondage and domination.

When I came up with the idea of writing Hands On I was watching the Blue Collar Comedy Tour. Admittedly NOT sexy, but my first thought was, “what about blue collar women?”

And so, my fantasy was to create three blue collar women who were sexually confident and comfortable with their sexuality. So comfortable in fact they’re open to experimentation (though Carlotta was a bit reluctant about being spanked) and they can all admire a great set of boobs. Maybe it’s just me, but as much as I enjoy the male form for all it’s hot, hard hunkiness, I can also appreciate the female form all it’s differences (and curves).

One of the things I really enjoyed about writing Hands On was the variety of fantasies I got to explore….everything from semi-public sex (more than once) to a FFM threesome to…you guessed it, a little bondage and domination (there’s something incredibly sexy about an oh-so-subtle Alpha Male).

So, what’s your fantasy…and if you don’t feel like sharing specifics, have you ever acted out one of your fantasies? Did it live up to your expectations?
I’m going to treat you to an excerpt of Hands On: Carlotta and anyone who comments below will be entered to win a copy. You’ve got until Monday June 4 and I’ll announce the winner on Tuesday June 5^th (my normal blogging day)

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Hello. Bonjour. Guten Tag. Hola. Nei Ho. Buon giorno. Ohayou gozaimasu. And hello in many other languages I may not know. :)

Thanks for coming by Naughty and Spice on our opening day!

What are we exactly? Well, we’re four authors who think alike, have similar writing styles, and have no qualms about saying whatever the heck is on our mind. We wanted a place where we could just kick back and have fun. Next week we’ll be having some drawings and give aways to those who come by and comment! (Yes, that’s code for we’re bribing you to come back).

So since I’m your Monday blogger, let me officially get this party started!

Am I expecting too much because I write romance novels?

Seriously. I write these ultra romantic books, with sex that could set the curtains on fire. But let me tell you, I’m not writing from first hand accounts. Scrolling back through my relationships and the men I’ve dated, I don’t think I’ve ever had that kind of passion. I’ve had kisses that get me physically excited and bring out the tummy flips, and I’ve gotten really close to that level. But have I had that toe curling, I can’t think straight, “take me to bed or lose me forever” passion? And the answer is…no. I don’t think so at least.

So I have to wonder, am I writing some romantic form of fantasy? Does this stuff of books and movies exist? This ultimate passion of You drive every thought–even the coffee pot I left on–out of my mind. Or am I just writing how most young girls envision it to be? How I always envisioned it would be. Maybe I’ve just set the bar too high. Or is tummy flipping what it’s all about, and I’m just impossible to please? Does the toe curling come the deeper you fall in love (because that’s another thing, I’ve only been in the shallow water of love.) Maybe I’m over analyzing this all, maybe I’m doing something wrong. Am I being unrealistic to want that kind of passion? Please share your thoughts!

Happy Memorial Day